15-03-2010
Dear Begadang,
I have no idea what’s wrong with you. You seem lost somewhere and can’t go back. I know family can be this hard but you have to survive. I am wondering why you keep doing wrong things while all people who love you warn you. I am deeply sorry that I can’t keep an eye on you when I am studying here. I wish you could tell me what things bother your mind. You hide something that you cant tell. I am afraid that I would see me in your self next year ahead. Don’t be! I know you are still a teenager and it’s fine to do wrong things but get real soon! It could ruin your life.
Sometimes, we cant tell the truth to parents otherwise they would get hurt. You have to bottle it up and get away if you feel upset. But please keep on your track! You have some good friends in neighborhood that you have left. We can amuse our selves by going out with friends but choose good friends so you are safe searching your true life. I am happy that you are not like my teenage. When I was the same age as you, I spent much time in my room in tears, saw mum go out with different man many times (believe me it’s tearing me down), attended mum and dad’s divorced court for listening to the judge who was innocent and guilty ones (it was horrible to know their bad , and felt lost. I see you often hang out with friends when you don’t feel like staying at home.
You’ve changed a lot this past three years. I know you’ve gotten this big. It is true you have to explore many things but please don’t smoke as you have heart disease, don’t drink as it is so bad for your health, and don’t go out in the night as night breeze could make your heart freeze.
I am quite strict at you as you are the only male sibling in our family. You must be able to keep you sisters well. Dad loves you so much and even he always gives you anything you desire (you are so lucky, I see that your friends do not possess what you do) Mom grants your wishes as she needs backbone to smooth her new family. All things that you don’t want to see in that home is some lessons for you that someday you don’t do the same things.
If you are sick of seeing mom, just tell me. If you are sick of seeing dad, write me something. If you are sick of your sisters, text us. It is hard to tell what you feel inside, but it is much worse if you do not tell anyone. You can hate me but don’t hate parents like I do to one of parents. It is the worst thing ever that children feel everytime.
You are always in trouble at school. I know you have some unsolved problems, many times I say to let me know and we can figure them out together. Wondering why you need much money beyond what I need. Hope you are not spending it for destructive things. If you are afraid of asking dad or mom for money, tell me I could manage it. Sometimes you forget that you still have us. You think that all your friends can save your life.
Falling in love is a thing that all people can have it once or many times. Don’t get blinded by love that you sometimes do not figure it out. Ask your self once, who is your family? I do understand if you once thought, you had different life from others. Just be patient and wait up, someday many good things will stop by in our life. People should wait up, God is knitting good things for his people.
Your Beautipul Sister
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